Twenty-three Things...

...To Do When You Learn The Company You Just Started Working For Has Been Acquired

1. Panic
2. Have a glass of wine
3. Eat chocolate
4. Cuddle with your cat/dog/knitting
5. Curl up in the fetal position
6. Scoff under your breath every time management says "They're not going to make any changes to our organization."
7. Secretly want to slap your cube neighbor upside the head when he announces that he's going to make a killing on his stock options; that, at a minimum, they'll need him for the transition; and that "associates" at his level automatically get six months severance in the event of a layoff
8. Kick yourself for not having negotiated stock options
9. Rent "Office Space" and watch it with a glass of wine, a box of chocolate, your dog at your feet, your knitting at your side, and your cat curled up on top of you as you lay in the fetal position, mumbling about condescending management and obnoxious co-workers
10. Start knitting a baby cap for "Caps to the Capital". (Patterns for the caps using DPNs are at the Warm Up America site.) The thought of helping to save a baby's life with a simple knit cap is good for perspective.
11. Hit the job boards and repost your resume (hey--at least there's not much to update...)
12. Order this. And this.
13. Re-evaluate your monthly spending. Cancel Weight Watchers membership, gym membership. Consider reducing yarn budget, but opt to cancel telephone service instead.
14. Find things around the house to sell on eBay ("Hmm... won't be needing that fancy cordless telephone anymore...). Avoid selling knitting-related items--knitting's going to be the cheapest therapy you get.
15. Worry about how this might affect every facet of your future, both professionally and personally.
16. Make appointments with all your doctors while you still have health insurance.
17. Consider refinancing the house, taking cash out, while you're still employed, and curse the lousy timing of the real estate "downturn"
18. Consider selling the house and moving to a less expensive state. Curse the lousy timing of the real estate "downturn"
19. Consider actually using the real estate sales license you got the last time this happened as a way to make a living, and curse the lousy timing of the real estate "downturn"
20. Ignore the dirty dishes, the laundry, and the messages on the answering machine
21. Go to bed when you get home from work -OR- stay up until the wee hours surfing the Web, knitting, and staring into space
22. Hit "snooze" 42 times before you get up for work in the morning, and then worry that you'll be late for the layoff
23. Post a list of "twenty-three things to do when you learn the company you just started working for has been acquired" to your blog