Melancholy

In spite of a wonderful start to 2007, I'm in a rather melancholy mood. And I have no real reason to be.

Beginnings and Endings

It is the end of my vacation (I couldn't get the week between Christmas and New Year's off, so I took the week after New Year's), which is part of it. I really don't want to go back to work. And in the four work days I was off, our general manager announced his resignation and left. I have concerns about his replacement.

But this is all to be expected, since the company is being acquired. This week should be full of changes to herald the new year as a new company--and even more changes. Thus, I'm looking for a new job.

I must remind myself that endings make room for new beginnings, and not all endings are sad. (And not all beginnings are happy.) If I lose this job, I will miss the income, but that's about it. However, I will miss it sorely, and would far prefer to replace the job with another, so as not to disturb the income. (Of course, there's no guarantee that I'll lose this one--just a "been there, done that" knee-jerk reaction to working for a high-tech company that's being acquired. You know somebody's going to go, and I haven't even been here a year.)

So, as is tradition for this time of the year, I feel forced to reflect on my life and determine what I want to do/can do/should do now.

I am grateful that this is just my job. For the first time in a very long time, I'm happy about my personal life. And perhaps that is just a bit of this melancholy, too. 2006 was a very good year for me, personally. 2007 is off to a fabulous start on a personal level (although not so much on a professional level). But the future, though full of promise, is uncertain, and I'm not much of a gambler. Still, there is much out there to be won. But do I dare ask for more happiness? There is a very large part of me that sees that as being ungrateful for what I have, and that is most assuredly not the case. And yet, one nurtures the wonderful things in one's life, hoping to see them grow...

And then there's the blog. I have been woefully neglectful over the past few weeks. I have been to a change of command ceremony, a wedding, and a quiet New Year's celebration. (Again, endings and beginnings...) I have shared Christmas traditions, and started new ones. I have finished two scarves and have started and almost finished a hat. Which is too small. And which I will finish anyway. I have no pictures. I made no blog entries. But I'm not sure anyone else reads this thing anyway. I am beginning to question my need to blog, and specifically, my need to blog about knitting. I love to read the other blogs out there, but I don't know that I have anything unique to offer to the world of knitters. So over the next few months, there may be a bit of a metamorphosis here. Or I'll get over this black bile and go back to posting pictures of partial knits and knitting-related thoughts. But I suspect I'll transform this space (or another) into more of a travel blog. More endings. More beginnings...

All this just to say, "Sorry I haven't been posting--I have a lot on my mind right now."

Stay tuned, if you're so inclined.